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Why is it so easy to stay awake until 6am but so hard to wake up at 6am ?
When Miley Cyrus gets naked and licks a hammer it’s « art » and « music. » When I do it I’m « wasted » and « have to leave Home Depot. »
*follows dreams* *dreams don’t follow back* *unfollows dreams*
Saying I have a drinking problem is like saying Bruce Lee had a kung fu problem. It’s not a problem if you’re the best at it.
I wonder if Buzz and Woody ever met some of Andy’s mom’s toys.
Especially since they probably have the same names.
Before you marry someone, ask yourself :
« Will they be a good killing partner during the zombie apocalypse ? »
I hate when I smile at a stranger and they don’t smile back… I’m using my face muscles for you, you little shit.
Excuse my french
I make weird faces in photos because it’s better to look ugly on purpose.
Chicks in kicks
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